It’s Complicated, pt. 3

via nevver

I already have a steady stream of negativity in my life. I can depend on it. Like an old friend, things like cynicism, cattiness, and road rage constantly pop-up, reminding me that I don’t shit rainbows.

When it comes to dealing with simple problems though, I try to keep things simple. I mean, complicating things for the sake of complications is like jogging without an iPod. You could, but why? [(c) 2010, Duffie Osental]

It’s the same thing with making a conscious effort to do something you don’t want to do. You could, but why?

I grew up in a household of writers. I realized this…when I became aware enough to tell my elbow from my ass…but yes. I realized this again when I saw my sister’s Palanca and the wall for the awards, and it hit me: We’re gonna need a bigger wall [(c)Alice Sarmiento, self-confessed Asshole]. While there’s much to be said for the romance of all that creative and literary energy [when I was in grade school our house was a preschool during the school year and an  art school in the summer. I guess it’s only natural that Irene and I became teachers] there’s also much to be said for the neurosis. If we have things to say, we usually say them. Brutally. There are a lot of emotional wounds still on the mend.

Now just because you’re a writer doesn’t mean you know how to communicate. I mean, you know how to get a message across all flowery and pretty-like (like now!), but it’s not always exactly what you mean. After all, you are in the business of dressing words up.

While there have been occasional episodes of confusion, I’ve never had too many conflicts with my moral north despite my lack of a Catholic education and weekly church ritual. This could be because I used to live in the Banawe-Sta. Mesa area where they put those 4-Way Test billboards up on every block, so all I had to know was…

  1. Is it the truth?
  2. Is it fair to all involved?
  3. Will it build goodwill and better friendships?
  4. Will it be beneficial to all concerned?


The only way I know how to be good is to tell people close to me that I love them ALL THE TIME. And I always mean it. Always, because in a deadlock between not saying it one day, and then having that person die the next day, I’d rather say it even if it makes things awkward. It’s like saying bless you when someone sneezes. Did you know your heart stops every time you sneeze? You can’t make this shit up.

If I like you, I also say “Yes” a lot and make it a point to be there, in spirit or otherwise. I like a lot of people. If there’s an easier way to do things, I’ll go with that. And it’s usually easier to just like people.

I love the word “Will.” I think it is the most beautiful thing in the English language because it signifies so much certainty and commitment, and life is too short for anything else besides making things happen. You could preoccupy yourself with something not turning out the way you wanted it to, then shovel on the nightsoil of negative juju and spite, but that takes a lot of effort that you could have spent on good things–like shimmying at gigs, reading in bed, writing facebook notes, and shaking hands with awesomeness. You could dwell on your grievances, but why?

Again, about jogging without an iPod.

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