The Art of the Quotidian

aka Stop Pretending to be a Ditz when you clearly aren’t one

Unspoken rule of thumb: Your peers–especially the ones you don’t like–should want to be you.

You should drive around in your Expedition with Bitches Brew blasting from your obscenely expensive customized sound system. “Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot to turn it down as I rolled past you. I didn’t realize you’d just…be…standing there on the driveway. Waiting for a cab or something. Silly me!” Offer to call a cab for your colleague. Whip out your iPhone/Blackberry/Nokia that looks like a Blackberry but isn’t and start fiddle-faddling with the damn thing until a cab comes beaming down from outer space. Tell your colleague there’s no need to thank you, then zip away, knowing fully well you’ve left your window down with the volume untouched, leaving a trail of “I’m better than you” in your wake. Pretend you’re going broke in your efforts to sustain this ridiculous lifestyle. Don’t blatantly admit that it might be true.

aka Reverse Pedestal Syndrome

Yet there are limits to “I’m better than you.” How this kind of behavior coexists with the modest front we put up for our nearest and dearest is difficult territory to negotiate. It’s the root of “will the masses get it?” and every watered-down idea put on the table for the sake of making an easy buck. Along the way, I’ve noticed that vocabulary is a hard sell and the first thing diluted in a quest to “be understood” that is misguided at best and damaging at worst.

We aim to please and impress with material goods, conveniently forgetting that image is just one side of the story. Then we clam up when it comes to our ideas and opinions, which we irresponsibly allow to buckle under weight of so many smileys and “LOLs” and hehehehehehehes. Where else could “Meh ganon?” have come from?

aka You know the song “Lemon World”? This is that.

I do not get it. I do not get the reluctance to share what you know. I mean is intellectual capital as ridden with shame as financial capital? Are we that classist? It’s not even classism it’s reverse classism but somehow it’s applicable only to the things where it shouldn’t count. Why do we act dumber than we actually are, for the sake of being liked?

End Note: I don’t want to be around anyone with the potential to outdo me on a level that I cannot buy my way into.

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